Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Year

Catch the
B-B-B-B-E-E-E-E-A-A-A-A-T-T-T-T in 2009:






If you haven't decided on a New Year's resolution yet, resolve to dance little harder in the new year.


Sunday, December 21, 2008

Stay Warm This Holiday Season



It's cold outside. Time to turn on that old radiator and engage your thermostat.


Monday, December 15, 2008

Shake It, Don't Break It

What kind of sensations do you feel?

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Victory at Last?


Today, while on his recent and last visit to Iraq, George Bush called the military surge in Iraq:

"One of the greatest successes in the history of the United States military"


And then this happened:


Friday, December 12, 2008

Shake That Thang


HEY (HEY) OH (OH) ...
HEY (HEY) OH (OH) ...
HEY (HEY) OH (OH) ...

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Cool it down


If you keep your cool, then, you'll be in control.

Fire It Up



The following memo was leaked by Rick James to the staff at Oh Bang, Bang. The following is a memo from Rick James to Barack Obama

TO: Barry
FROM: Slick Rick

Subject: Fire It Up

I decided to come back from the super natural realm of Stone City and write you. And you better listen to up, because, well, I'm RICK JAMES, BITCH!

My first piece of advice is: Don't lie to the kids.

You see, all the kids in US of A have only seen liars for presidents.

All these white boys have lied:

George Bush Senior told the kids back in the 80s:
"Read my lips, no new taxes."



Our supposed brother, Slick Willy, (Billy Bob Clinton) lied to the kids when he told everyone, "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" (and that woman was Monica- she sure was a crazy thang!)



And well, GW Bush was the biggest goddamn liar of them all.

He lied about the election results in 2000 and 2004.
He told the kids that there were weapons of mass destruction in Iraq (and now some brothers are dying unnecessarily out in the middle of the desert. ) Has anyone found those weapons in the desert yet?
I'm not even going list all the lies GW Bush told to the kids.




Basically, the biggest and best thing that you can do for the kids in the USA is to tell the truth.

Barry, Please don't lie to the kids!!!

Perhaps the biggest challenge of your administration:
You gotta restore some god damn dignity to the white house. Don't get caught with your pants down; Don't go running around trying to blow the Iranians off the map.

You got just be yourself in the oval office. Nobody is perfect. We're ALL freaks! So, if you decide to get freaky in the white house, just be honest about it. People love honesty, even if the truth is negative. Nobody likes to be lied to. Just think. What would you do if you caught your boo, Michelle gettin' freaky with another man? and then she lied to you about? You'd be angry if you found out Michelle lied. So, all I'm saying is: Don't lie to the kids. Its time to restore some trust in the presidency and the government.

Next, the following occurred to me: So, you're going to roll up to Pennsylvania Avenue and turn the white house black? Is the white house still the white house with you, a black man, living inside of it!?

Sweet Lord Have Mercy! You need to throw a BBQ on the white house lawn every week to celebrate the blessings that earth mother has bestowed on you! I'll even come back from the other worlds that I exist in and play my songs at the BBQ. We can get all sorts of FREAKY in the white house swimming pool, the rose garden, and Abraham Lincoln's bedroom.

Fire it up! Fire it up! Fire it up! Fire it up Mr. President

Fire up the grill on the white house lawn. So, for these weekly sunday BBQ's, here's what you do: randomly select 100 towns. Then, select 100 people at random from those 100 random towns. Next, invite them over to the white house for the BBQ. Have them come over and show them a good time: Nothing brings people together better than getting crunked together. Finally, require the 100 randomly selected people in the 100 randomly selected towns to host a BBQ in their neighborhood; this will get them talking about community issues. Before the US starts to solve some of the problems its facing, people have to start communicating with each other about the complexity of the problems. Many Americans live in a sad, cold, lonely isolation; its time to fire it up the public enthusiasm and get people working together.

The American public will LOVE you for hosting these weekly BBQs; to the public, it will appear like when the Palace of Versailles in Paris was opened to the people. To many Americans, the white house currently looks like some sort of old skool white palace, a symbol of the power of the new neoliberal Ancien RĂ©gime.

Franklin Roosevelt had his weekly fire side radio chats; you should hold a weekly Sunday BBQ at your new crib. Everybody loves a good BBQ. Its time to show the world that America is a fun and funky place.

Oh. And brother, try to do a little somethin' for the ghetto.
Anything- more doctors, better schools, somethin'

So, I leave you with this:



AND SERIOUSLY:
Tenements, slums and corner bums
Playing tag with winos
The only way to have some fun!

we all just want to have fun. Just try to remember to have some freaky fun in all those classy meetings that you find yourself in.

much love from Stone City,

Slick Rick

Try

Just a little bit harder.....

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Bounce Back



Bounce
Rock Skate (ro-o-ol)
Rock, skate,
Roll bounce
Rock, skate

Bounce Rock
Roll Bounce (Bo-ounce)

(ro-o-o-o-ol-o-o-o-ol)


(boooounce)

bounce rock skate roll






Tuesday, December 2, 2008

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRITNEY!




If you haven't heard, Britney Spears released her new album, Circus yesterday, on her 27th Birthday.



After watching the recent documentary,
Britney: For the Record, what can we conclude about Spears?




Well. One might say its sort of like when X-Rex-Spex released this song:




Some people think little girls should be seen and not heard - well I think, oh bondage, up yours!



So, what are X-Ray-Spex and
Britney Spears both actually saying?

One youtube user made this comment about the
Britney song, Womanizer:

kb1686 (1 hour ago):
this is the worst britney song i've heard. it's so uncreative.... boy don't try to front ah ah i know just what you are ah ah boy don't try to front ah ah i know just what you are ah ah boy don't try to front ah ah i know just what you are ah ah womanizer oh womanizer oh womanizer womanizer oh woman womanizer.... quite possibly to worst lyrics i've ever heard



Perhaps, both X-Rex-Spex and
Britney Spears are both saying:



┏┫  | |  ┣┓  ┏┓
┗┫━━ ┃ ━━┣┛  ┣┫
 ┃ ━━━━━ ┃ ┏┳┫┣┳┓
 ┗━━┳━┳━━┛ ┃    ┃



Really, your personal opinion of Britney Spears Womanizer song is irrelevant: This song has been viewed over 26,089,245 times on youtube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZSLIq6YiRY

Britney Spears must be saying something relevant if 26 million people from around the world all took 3 minutes and 45 seconds out of their busy lives to watch the video. Interpret Britney's new album, Circus, however you want to, but don't claim that Britney Spears isn't relevant at this current moment.

Perhaps
Britney got the her birthday wish, something that everyone wishes for: being relevant.

What does it mean to be relevant?: well according to the dictionary: (adjective) bearing upon or connected with the matter in hand; pertinent

Everyone wants to relevant, but few are. Happy Birthday
Britney! You've done it again.

Friday, November 28, 2008

An Endless Suppy that Doesn't Run Dry

Outside an Oakland, CA train station:

Man: What you be doin'?

Woman: You know, turfin'.
Man: Turfin'?

Watch it to find out.







Thursday, November 27, 2008

Shake Your Pants in Thanksgiving!


Ooh, ooh, ah, ah
Ooh, ooh, yeah
Ooh, ooh, ah, ah
Ooh, ooh, yeah!

Shake your pants for action and romance.



Cameo - Shake Your Pants (Live 1980)





We all have a lot things to be thankful for.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Let's Go For a Ride in Chubby Santa's Sled


So apparently, this holiday season, men around the country are using Enzyte, the male enhancement product.

But does Enzyte
really work? Its unclear. ww.coreynahman.com/enzyte-information-review.html reports that:

It's hard to say if Enzyte works because the Enzyte people are vague about what Enzyte does. If you believe in natural remedies and you are willing to risk a few bucks you should try it - it has a money back guarantee.


OMG. A MONEY BACK GUARENTEE!! You obviously should try it if you can allegedly get your money back! Plus, you get the male enhancement cream to slather on all the special places of your body. In the words of the McDonald's Corporation, "Why Wait?"

But wait. Hold up. Time out. Actually, maybe you should wait on ordering your supply Enzyte pills. You can only spit game if you got game. People can see through fakers, sycophants and liars.

For instance, notorious B.I.G was spitting some game because he had game; he didn't need Enzyte to make himself a man. Anyone that uses enzyte is surely a doinker, or at least someone who is not well off enough to have a job with health insurance that covers viagra prescriptions.





But then, maybe we should do it still we're satisfied?




Perhaps in order to be able to spit some real game, you have to hustle a little and work for it. You just can't buy a pill to solve all your problems, sexual or otherwise. That would be too easy. But then again, maybe a natural male enhancement pill can solve most of problems? Enzyte claims it can solve your problems. Perhaps it just depends on what your problems are.





Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Let Us Hit You With It

Karma is a bitch


For the greater part of this year, Joe Lieberman campaigned for John McCain and turned his back on the democrats. After the election, it was clear that Joe Lieberman bit the hand that fed him.

Earlier this year, at a campaign rally for John McCain, Lieberman mentioned:

"You know, Political Parties are important in our country. But they're not more important than what's best for our country, they're not more important friendship, they're not more important for our future. That's why I'm PROUDLY here, to urge republicans and independents in New Hampshire to come out on January 8 and make John McCain the next president of the United States"





In case you missed it, Joe Lieberman was welcomed back into the democratic party by Harry Reid last week.



Last week, Rachel Maddow ran a bunch of interesting stories on MSNBC about Joe Lieberman. On a short segment between a commercial break, Maddow pops the question, some thing along the lines of, "What will the liberal blogger's reaction be to the democratic party's welcoming of Joe Lieberman back into the partyfold?"


(Note: Rachel doesn't pop the blog sphere question in this segment...but really, who are these liberal bloggers? Do they exist in some sort of blog sphere? as if they had some sort of political power in a tangible reality?)

Rachael Maddow, here is a possible reaction from the "liberal blog sphere":


(In case you didn't quite get it, this song is totally ironic; Johnny Dangerous is totally mocking violent house/hip hop songs with the stereotypical, boring, repetitive monotone beat and the line, "Club America, Club America")

Here are the political possibilities at hand:

Since Senator Stevens lost his seat in Alaska, the democrats now control 58 seats in the senate. 2 senate races in Minnesota and Georgia are still undecided.

Two days ago, www.politics-360.com reported that Al Frankin
was likely to beat his challenger, Norm Coleman. (http://www.fivethirtyeight.com/2008/11/projection-franken-to-win-recount-by-27.htmlGA) That brings the democrats up to 59 seats in the senate.

In Georgia, a sub situation is occurring: Georgia law requires a candidate to get 50% of the vote plus ONE vote. In a hotly contested senate battle between democrat Jim Martin and the charming republican incumbent Saxby Chambliss, Chambliss won a majority of the plurality of the vote on Nov 4, however, did not garnish the necessary 50%. A third party challenger used the closeness of the race to take some of the vote share away from Chambliss. So, as prescribed by state law, Saxby and Jim have to have a rematch on Dec 2 in a special election contest.
No one is clear what the likely outcome will be.

So, to get back to it, it looks like Al Frankin will pull in one more victory in for team democrat. This allows democrats to control 59 seats in the senate, one away from the holy grail of the 60 votes that Larry Reid keeps saying that he needs to be able to get things done around hill.

Do the Democrats really need 60 votes? Harry Reid has been putting fast ones on the American public for months.


Almost one year ago today, the democrats promised the American public that they were going to do something about the ending the Iraq war. (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2007/11/14/democrats-may-force-alln_n_72591.html). So, to make it look like they were doing something, Harry Reid staged a mock filibuster about ending the Iraq war.



This is perhaps the most boring filibuster that the staff at Oh, Bang, Bang.com has ever seen. If the democrats really cared about ending the war in Iraq, then, Harry Reid should have forced the republicans to wage a filibuster. On the night of the "all night filibuster", Reid should have used his leadership position to make sure that every democrat was in the Senate Chamber. Make it a spectacle: Pack the chamber and cause a ruckus: Make our founding fathers proud. For once, try to force the republicans to do some work, shut the whole thing down and bring debate to a close by invoking cloture.

Harry Reid didn't do any of those things. The chamber was empty and not animated. Really, he didn't need 60 votes for the Iraq War withdraw bill. At the time, Reid could have probably persuaded moderate republicans to go along with the democrats; that would have brought the Yea- withdraw vote count up to 60. The bill would have passed through the senate, and the United states might be much further along in getting the f*ck out of Iraq (and the war in Iraq is a huge problem that has already cost the US 3 trillion dollars- that's a big wad of cash).

To clarify popular misinformation: Democrats don't actually need to control 60 votes in the senate to invoke cloture on the republicans during the next session of congress.

All the republican senators are scared: the republican party was almost annihilated on the Nov 4. Every one on the entertainment news TC channels keeps blathering about compromise and a "spirit of bipartisanship". If this is actually the sediment around Washington DC, then, the democrats don't need 60 seats; Harry Reid should be able to "persuade" republican senators to vote for democratic bills in the upcoming session.

With regards to Joe Lieberman:

Perhaps in a secret senate cloak back room Nancy Pelosi and harry Reid held a gun to Lieberman' s head and threatened Lieberman:

"You have to vote with the democratic party on every bill. period," and then made Lieberman sign a contract in blood.

If Lieberman did this, or some sort of deal was reached, then, it will allow the democrats to control 60 seats in the senate. Once the democrats have the 60 votes, Harry Reid will lack excuses for the senate's perpetual paralysis inaction (and if there is legislative paralysis next session, that might put Reid in a very precarious political situation if he is unable to force the democrats to get along and pass some legislation)

Additionally, if Mr. Saxby Chambliss gets defeated in Georgia, the democrats will control 61 votes with Lieberman; 60 votes without him....and this assessment presupposes the fact that every democrat is going to go along with the party on every bill; this is a seriously dubious fact

Really, the questions surrounding Lieberman are irrelevant. Either way, the democrats should be able to dominate the senate. Public opinion is behind them.

What was Obama suppose to do about Lieberman? Beat that bitch with a bat? Unlikely.

Lieberman has dug his own grave. He has made a total fool of himself in the last couple of months. Even if he keeps his leadership positions in the senate, he has no power to exercise since he has lost all respect and credibility with other congresspeople and the American public.
He simply looks like a traitor; historically, Americans don't like traitors and have little sympathy for them.

Everyone needs to relax about this whole issue. Obama's response to the Lieberman question was savvy: Obama welcomed Lieberman back into the fold because he knew that Lieberman was politically powerless and therefore was not a threat to his political agenda.

Do you pity the fool?


Monday, November 24, 2008

Oh Girl. You're Totally Amazing!


Do you ever feel like you're dreaming but then realize you're not sleeping?

If you found yourself in jail, what would you do when you got out of jail?

The Tom Tom Club thinks that the situation would unfold something like this:


Three women in a jail cell
Two women, together: What are you gonna do when you get out of jail?
Other woman: I'm gonna have some fun.
Two women, together: What do you consider fun?
Other woman: Fun, Natural Fun.





Mariah Carey has some interesting insights into the above situation. To Mariah, being with someone in a situation where there is no beginning and no ending is a fantasy. Mariah Carey seems trapped in the prison of loneliness.




But then again, perhaps Mariah Carey is being overly sentimental. Perhaps we all can and should act out our fantasies like Fergie.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

The Weekends Were, Made for Fun


Lookout weekend! Here comes Debbie Deb!

What is Debbie Deb's take on the weekend?

Debbie Deb instructs, "Weekends were, made for fun.....
"All you ladies, clap your hands, stomp your feet and grab your man"

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Turkey Day Turmoil!



Every day with Sarah Palin is a blast!!!

A reporter asks Sarah Palin something like, Do you think the campaign trail changed you?

Sarah Palin: I don't think its changed me at all. I have the same values and convictions and positions and policies. I'm just at a greater appreciation for what other candidates go through. You know, It's pretty brutal. The time consumption there, and energy in order to go out and about at a national level. Also, a great appreciation for this great country. There are so many good Americans who are desiring of their government to kinda of get out of the way and grow and progress and allow our businesses to grow and progress. So a great appreciation for those that share that value. And it was a blast! every day was just a blast out there on the trail.

As Sarah Palin told the reporter that she had a BLAST on the campaign trail, a man behind her slaughters a turkey. To kill the turkey, the man behind Sarah Palin seems to be inserting a turkey head first into some sort of machine (perhaps a grinder machine). What the hell is going on here? Its unclear....




Although Sarah Palin seems cold and ruthless by appearing to be oblivious to the turkey being slaughtered behind her in a news interview, Sarah Palin must have a heart somewhere in her chest.

Since she is no longer running for VP, Sarah Palin has more time on her han
ds. After the interview, Sarah Palin chose a turkey to pardon.

(there is an old American tradition dating back to Abraham Lincoln that requires the president and the governor of each state to save one turkey from the thanksgiving slaughter. Apparently, Abe Lincoln spared the life of a turkey because his son Tad, wanted to keep the thanksgiving turkey as a pet. Subsequent presidents chose to present both a live and cooked turkey in the white house for thanksgiving
).

Palin named the turkey that she saved, "Thanksgving". Real creative, Sarah Palin. Name the pardon turkey thanksgiving to further confuse the public with your republican robot media speak.

Sarah Palin announced:
I, Sarah Palin, Governor of Alaska, anticipating and hoping that in the spirit of Thanksgiving, Alaskans everywhere will find adequate nourishment elsewhere and without this particular turkey, I do hereby by grant thanksgiving a full amnesty and pardon.




OMG! What is this woman even saying? Can you believe that she had a shot at becoming the vice president of the united states?!

Fun Friday


Hopefully, you found a bumpin' party to be at tonight. If you didn't have any desire to party tonight for whatever reason, (perhaps you already partied yesterday, Thursday night, the new Friday night or had a dragging work week) then, hopefully, you found yourself having a deluxe evening at your home or your friend's home. If failed to find either a bumpin' party or a deluxe situation, then, perhaps you're not looking hard enough. If you went to a lame party, then, its probably because no one was dancing.

Remember Midnight's Star's Golden Rule:
"NO PARKING, BABY,
NO PARKING ON THE DANCE FLOOR"




Its thrilling to have fun.


Friday, November 21, 2008

Freaky Friday

Get freaky on the dance floor?

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Sex over the Telephone



Have you ever had sex over the telephone? Well, lots of people do. According to wikipedia, phone sex is a "type of virtual sex that refers to sexually explicit conversation between two or more persons via a telephone".

In most cases, the client calls a phone number and requests a particular erotic performer. Using credit cards, Automated Clearing House systems, and a variety of other homemade billing methods, the client buys the exotic performer's time; then the erotic performer and the client have a sexy chat over the telephone.

Another possible set up for a phone sex service is as follows: Using a local phone number, a client calls a receptionist asking for his or her fantasy. The receptionist then tries to find a suitable woman or man to call the client back. Then a erotic performer calls the client back.

How do people find phone numbers for exotic phone numbers? Phone sex service providers advertise their services on cable television, men's magazines, in pornographic magazines and videos,and online.

A typical phone sex tv commercial could be something like this:




Have you ever been tempted to call into a 1-900 hundred number? Who runs these phone sex services?

Most modern phone sex services are run by a network of of local dispatchers and erotic performers (live or automated) . Before connecting a customer/caller to a erotic performer, the dispatcher processes payment information and verifies the legal age of the "customer".

In the late 1980's, local phone companies and major long distance carriers were actively in cahoots with phone sex service companies. The telephone companies provided billing services for chat line companies. The telephone companies billed callers for calling the sexy 1-900 number at a certain high rate and then remitted 45% of the money collected to chat line operators.

Many customers felt embarrassed or ashamed when they saw the phone sex charge on their phone bills. Either to prevent revealing their activity to a significant other or refusing to pay the charges they had incurred, many customers disputed the phone sex call charges on their phone bills, even though the customers had probably made the calls. When a customer disputed a charge, the telephone company forgave the charge but blocked the caller from using or calling any other 1-900 number.

Large numbers of disputes over phone sex billing caused the phone sex industry to gain a shoddy reputation; the public perceived that the phone sex companies were engaging in shoddy age and billing verifications services.

But don't sweat it. You'll never have to give into your temptations in calling a 1-900 number/ phone sex chat line.

In 1996, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) started to regulate the exotic phone service industry. To avoid legal action, many erotic phone sex companies switched to 1-800 numbers. Although most phone sex companies have switched to 1-8000 numbers to avoid legal repercussions, some phone sex services still rely upon premium-rate telephone numbers (e.g. 976 and 900 numbers).

Due to an increase in FCC regulation and a number of other factors, such as the Internet (there is plenty of cyber sex and internet porn to go around), by 2007, only three phone companies remained in the phone sex chat line business: Verizon, MCI and AT&T. According to wikipedia, Verizon provided billing services to phone sex calls made in MA, RI, and ME. AT&T and MCI offered nationwide collection services, but limit the phone sex call to a maximum of $50 dollars per call.

Not only did phone companies get out of the phone sex business, but so did the phone sex dispatchers and erotic phone performers. By 2007, only a few chat line companies remained active.

So what is a typical phone sex call like? Apparently, according to the village people it goes something like this.

Man sits down on a chair, picks up a touch tone phone and dials a number

Man: "Hello. Fantasy Hotline."
Phone sex dispatcher: "What is your credit card number?"
Man: "69667113."
Phone sex dispatcher: "Your phone number?"
Man: "751-6177'
Phone sex dispatcher: " What's your fantasy?"
Man: "I want to speak to a very HOT one!'



Just watch this video to find out!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Slick Ladies in the City

See the street pass underneath your feet



Thursday night is the new Friday night. These days, everyone seems to be partying in the city on Thursdays. Perhaps the United States has lost its patience waiting for the weekend.

Gambling On a River Boat Casino: Let's Do It!


Have you ever gambled on a river boat casino? Have you ever considered gambling on a river boat casino? Have you ever fantasized about gambling on a river boat casino?

Apparently, lots of people gamble on river boat casinos.



So what provokes people to build new river boat casinos? What provokes people to want to gamble on a river boat casino? According to the video above, in 1989, Bettendorf, IA became the first modern city to legalize river boat gambling.

Then the maritime gaming industry exploded; 6 states issued over 100 riverboat gambling licenses were issued along the Mississippi river.

Making hundreds of gambling boats, shipyards across USA scrambled to meet the demand.

Over the next years, from 1989-1995 the riverboat gambling industry exploded; the river boat gambling industry couldn't keep up with the public demand.

Riverboat Casinos generated billions of dollars in revenue. The video claims that "State and Local governments were HIGHLY motivated to help casino operators to meet the public's demand."

Even after local and state governments helped the casino river boat operators, the public demand to gamble on a river exceed the capacity of the river boat casinos.

The video claims that each river boat casino boat could on average, had the capacity to hold 2500- 3000 people.

So, apparently, in the mid 1990s, thousands of people were gambling on river boat casinos.

What were these people thinking? Apparently, thousands of people wanted to take a gamble on a river boat. Someone woke up in the mourning and said to his or her friend, "Hey, I want to gamble on a river boat in the Mississippi." And the person's friend responded, "Let's do it, there's nothing to it!"

Perhaps the thousands of people that decided to take a gamble on a river boat casino listened to this song and felt inspired:

So, take a risk, take a gamble and click on the song.


On Nov. 4, 2008, Americans took a serious gamble by going to the polls and casting their ballots for Barack Obama. American voters made a good decision; America needs to take a gamble on governing. All the old ways of doing things don't appear to be working. Public schools in the US are falling apart. 1 in 4 bridges in USA is likely to collapse in the next 10 years. Most people don't have health insurance, and if a person does have health insurance, the coverage is shitty and a person ends up paying mad, crazy cash for their doctor visits and medicine. And in case you didn't know, apparently America is in the midst of some sort of economic depression; many many analysts claim that the current economic situation in the USA is worse than the 1929 "Great" Depression.

It appears that Barack Obama has a lot to fix; all eyes seem to be on him. Sure, the entertainment television media is reporting that
Ted Stevens is out of office (thank god. the staff at ohbangbang.com is sleepin' easier at night). Hillary Clinton is probably going to secretary of state (Two for the price of one?! Does that mean that Billy Bob wll accompany her on state business?). And the democrat leadership forgave crazy kook Joe Lieberman for supporting John McCain and allowed him to maintain his senate leadership positions. These things are merely distractions.

Perhaps rather than looking to Washington DC and Barack Obama for solutions to our public problems, we as Americans ought to look to ourselves for solutions. Take a gamble like those thousands of people that took a gamble on a river boat cruise in the 1990s. Go out and take a walk around your local community. What public problems do you see? Ohbangbang.com assures you that there are many things that you can personally do to ameliorate the local problems that you see. It can be something simple, like recycling your plastic bottles, or it could be something more substantial, like running for a position on the local school board.

Seriously. Stop blaming the Bush administration and the democratic party for you current problems. The federal government is unlikely to find a solution to your personal problem, mostly because the federal government was designed by the founding fathers to move and change slowly. In this modern age, it is almost impossible for the federal government to keep up with the public demands' and the public problems at hand.

So, if you want change, (and America voted for change by electing Barack Obama into the white house), you have to make changes in your own life and in your own community. You can live out your fantasies if you're willing to do the work to make them happen.

We can learn a lot from the river boat gambling industry. People working together created and built hundreds of floating river boat casinos in the 1990s. Thousands of people came out to gamble and have a good time on those river boats. So, if Americans found a way to gamble on a river, Americans are surely smart enough to fix the government and do something about solving our some of our public problems....

But really, take a gamble on living out your fantazies. Just do it. You should go to the river, because everyone should make some gambles and take some gambles. Maybe Al Green can take us all to the river...




Anyone want to buy a river boat casino?! http://www.coastalmarineltd.com/inventory-list.asp

Lets buy this river boat, (http://www.coastalmarineltd.com/inventory-detailtest.asp?ID=42)

Take a gamble together and float down stream somewhere a sunny...

Don't Be Blue

Check out this video. Apparently, the spirit of the St. Louis blues is a talking guitar robot! Who knew?!


Monday, November 17, 2008

Monday Mourning Madness

The weekend is over; time to take the bus back to work this mourning. Before your Monday mourning commute to work, watch this random video of Frankie Smith singing about buses and double dutch....



And if your still having problems motivating yourself to go to work, just watch this video for "Funky Town". The beat will get you movin.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Sunday Night Sappiness

Ever feel like you just have to be with someone? Ever have serious regrets?

Mary J. Blige lays it all out there in this song:

Closets and Ladies Rooms

The Political Wire reports that Laura Bush showed Michelle Obama the closets in the White House when Michelle and Barack toured the White House last week.

Laura Bush stated, "I showed her the closets. I showed her all the things that women are interested in
" (http://politicalwire.com/archives/2008/11/15/bonus_quote_of_the_day.html)

Did Laura Bush show Michelle the ladies room? Perhaps the two had a meeting in the White House ladies room? Perhaps Laura Bush really said to Michelle Obama, "I got a meeting in the ladies room" Like the video below:

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Lucious Lips

The rumors are circulating.




-Timex Social Club- Rumors

Cash and Kisses

The the Global economy is in crisis. People are behind on their credit card payments; 6.5 % of Americans are out of work and unemployed. (http://www.bls.gov/) Perhaps we should all just print counterfeit money like the B-52s suggest. They seem to be having fun in having fun in the basement....





Once you print all the counterfeit money you need to fabulous, you're going to need someone attractive to give you a whammy kiss.


Monday, November 10, 2008

Bringing Sexy Back

Do you want to touch me there?



Joan Jett explains in the "Song Do you want to touch" that,
"Every girl an' boy
Needs a little joy
All you do is sit an' stare
Beggin' on my knees
Baby, won't you please
Run your fingers through my hair?"

Bobs. Explosions. Moving Chest Muscles. An attractive androgynous lady.

When voters in California were asked on Nov 4 if they supported the state's decision to allow boys to touch other boys and allow girls to touch other girls and receive the same tax breaks that men who touch other women and women who touch other men receive, voters said NO.

California voters' decision to ban gay marriage was a poor one. Hundreds homosexual couples got married before November 4, 2008. Now, is the state supposed to revoke the benefits that it gave to newly wed homosexual couples?

Really, California voters are foolish. The world will not end once the gays get married. Lightning bolts from God will not strike human beings on earth if two ladies go down to the city hall together to get married.

Opponents of prop 8 ran a bad campaign against the ballot initiative. Ads for No on Prop 8 were confusing and wordy. The issue is simple:

as a lady and an American citizen, do i have the right to touch a girl and receive tax breaks? doesn't my boo (who is lady) deserve my health insurance? You and your boo have health insurance.

Voters in California believe that a lady has the right to touch a man and receive tax breaks but doesn't believe that a lady has the right to touch another lady and receive tax break. Hmmm. Back to the dick/vag problem. Apparently, gender as an issue is more complicated of an issue than the American people would like to admit.

Its unclear what people in California are afraid of. Perhaps voters in Calfornia just want to deny individuals the joy of touching whoever they want, regardless of his or her gender.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

The United States did it, but it can do more

We Can. Not you Can. Not I Can, Not they Can, Not she Can, Not He Can, Not you all Can or Not y'all can. We Can.



-The Pointer Sisters With Gaylord Birch- " Yes We Can"

Some members of the Pointer Sisters are actually blood related- June, Bonnie, Ruth, and Anita.
Anita is older than June and Bonnie. Ruth is the eldest Pointer Sister.

As children living in Oakland CA, the Pointer sisters sang gospel music. The girls' parents, Reverend Elton and Mrs Sarah Pointer forbid their 4 girls from singing rock and roll and blues because they believed that rock and roll and blues to be the "devil's music." When their parents weren't around, the Pointer sisters sang rock and roll and blues songs. One day, June Pointer bought Elvis's "All shook up" record in front of her mom. June's Mom, Mrs. Pointer, dug Elvis and allowed June to continue playing the rock and roll record; Perhaps Mrs Pointer thought that Elvis religious singer when he sang, "Crying in the Chapel" on the "B" side of th the All Shook Up record.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Hooray!

In case you didn't know, Barack Obama clinched the presidency yesterday evening!

Hooray for the 1st Black President! It's about time.


Tuesday, November 4, 2008

One Nation under a Groove

Happy Election Day!

Check out this video! Bump and Groove to the Polls! Go vote today!




AND if you can't get enough:


Saturday, November 1, 2008

Do you like it like this?

What do you have to do to get a date with someone you like? Apparently, ladies like you more if you can dance.





If you're lost in the dark and can't dance, George Clinton and Parliament will help you find the your way to the funk with their cosmic disco flash light.





Thursday, October 30, 2008

Something Evil's Lurking in The Dark

It's Going to Be a Diller Halloween Night This Evening



Actually, the original "Thriller" music video is 13 minutes long. (You can watch the whole 13 minute segment at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtyJbIOZjS8. ) In the video, MJ does choreographed dance moves with zombies. He mutates from a school boy into both a zombie and a werecat. What is a werecat? According to wikipedia, a werecat is creature in folklore that is a shape shifter similiar to a werewolf. It is important to note that a werecat seems to have feline characteristics rather that dog like characteristics like werewolves. Rick Baker, Michael Jackson's makeup artist for the Thriller video, described MJ as a "Cat Monster."

MJ used grape jelly for the gory effects in the Thriller video. Apparently, MJ wasn't scaring anyone on the Thriller video set. In fact, the dancers in the video, aka the zombie chorus, demanded higher pay for their dancing skills and almost went on strike; tensions arose when dancers complained of leg pain from dancing on hard cement in specific shoes given to them by the Thriller video producers. In music videos, do dancers normally dance on rubber floors to avoid leg pain?


Halloween is about scary things- witches, zombies and the dead, to name a few. So Scary Halloween Question: Do you remember the first time you had sexual relations with another person? Losing your virginity can be scary. But Betty Wright isn't afraid of anything....





Using Betty Wright's hook from "Tonight is the Night", Sheek Louch doesn't appear to be afraid of boring and lame players and shorties in the club. He exclaims, "Anyway, I'm trying to see who else is here/ I see shorties staring at me way over there/ I'm sorry baby girl, but I just got to disapear / because I/" and it cuts to a Betty Wright sample, "I just can't keep still"




But Perhaps Sheek Louch can't keep still because the Candyman is on the prowl. Using Wright's hook from ""Tonight is the Night" the Candyman, in the opening line of "Knockin Boots", proclaims that he is on the PROWL.



Although the Candyman seems harmless in the above music video, you should be afraid of the the Candyman!!!



The urban legend in the movies goes as follows: A son of slave had a love affair with the (white) daughter of a plantation owner. As a result, he was brutally tortured and murdered for his love affair with a white woman.

According to the movie, if you say Candyman five times in a row, in front of your bathroom mirror, the crazy psychopath spririt/monster/beast/monster beast appears tries to kill you!


Candyman

Candyman

Candyman

Candyman

Say it the fifth time! double dare you!


Remember to check your Halloween candy for razors!